What Are Redundancies?

These nuisances are superfluous words or phrases also known as pleonasms. Rather than augment writing, they slow action scenes and increase word count — without adding constructive details.

About Quiz #5

This quiz, the fifth in its series, offers ten sentences containing redundancies, and ten suggested solutions.

They are edited examples from books, news media, television shows, and overheard conversations.

The Answers Are in the Definitions

Let’s find and ink out those unnecessary pleonasms.

In most cases, you should recognize the superfluous words when you scrutinize the definitions provided with each edit.

And maybe your muse will find story ideas among the changes and suggestions.

Can You Find Every Redundant Word or Phrase?

1. The property owner ordered the protestors to cease and desist.
2. A total of 231 plumbers registered for the conference.
3. The film was a biography of Shakespeare’s life.
4. The combatants stood in the forest, unwittingly in close proximity to one another.
5. The cheap knockoff purses looked exactly the same as the designer brands.
6. For a period of four days, they tried to reach their goal.
7. The woman reverted back to her abusive manner.
8. Of the two ropes, the first was shorter in length than the second.
9. She knew from her own experience that her patient would soon succumb to his injuries.
10. Her day always started with some kind of physical exercise.

Suggested Edits

Edit #1: The property owner ordered the protestors to cease and desist.

desist: to cease

Would an owner tell protestors to cease and cease?

Unlikely — but a cease-and-desist order is a legally enforceable mandate.

Scrutinize the context of your WIP and the POV character’s background. If the character has legal training or experience, cease and desist could be suitable.

Rather than cease and desist, however, one of the following might be more appropriate: cool it, cut it out, give up, leave, quit, stop, suspend.

Edit #2: A total of 231 plumbers registered for the conference.

total: constituting or comprising the whole number or amount

You’d never say, “The whole number of 231 plumbers registered for the conference.”

Usage note: When a number appears at the beginning of a sentence, it should be written out:

Two hundred and thirty-one plumbers registered for the conference.

Many writers would shorten the sentence further by removing and:

Two hundred thirty-one plumbers registered for the conference.

Edit #3: The film was a biography of Shakespeare’s life.

biography: an account of someone’s life

Instead of the edited version, you might prefer one of the following:

The film was Shakespeare’s biography.

The film was based on Shakespeare’s life.

Edit #4: The combatants stood in the forest, unwittingly in close proximity to one another.

proximity: the quality or state of closeness

As written, the combatants would be standing in close closeness.

Maybe one of the following would work better:

The combatants stood in the forest, unwittingly [within a few feet, within a few paces, within arm’s reach] of one another.

Or with a little creativity, you could write something like: The combatants stood in the forest, unwittingly almost close enough to smell one another’s breath.

Edit #5: The cheap knockoff purses looked exactly the same as the designer brands.

knockoff: a cheap copy of a popular and more expensive product

same: exactly alike; identical

Since knockoff and the same provide equivalent connotations to their modifiers, those modifiers are superfluous.

Edit #6: For a period of four days, they tried to reach their goal.

period: a portion of time

As written, the sentence could be construed as: For a portion of time of four days, they tried to reach their goal.

A better version might read: For four days, they struggled to reach their goal.

The strong verb struggled creates a vivid mental image.

More strong verbs: fought, labored, strived, toiled.

Edit #7: The woman reverted back to her abusive manner.

revert: to go back to a previous state or condition

Would you ever say, “The woman went back back to her abusive manner?”

Rather than reverted, consider phrasing that substitutes one of the following: devolved, regressed, relapsed.

Edit #8: Of the two ropes, the first was shorter in length than the second.

shorter: having less length

Since shorter by definition already includes length, length is redundant.

Better: The first rope was shorter than the second.

Edit #9: She knew from her own experience that her patient would soon succumb to his injuries.

experience: personal knowledge based on one’s direct observation or participation

Since experience is personal knowledge, her own is redundant.

If context allows it, the sentence could be shortened even further: She knew that her patient would die soon.

Edit #10: Her day always started with some kind of physical exercise.

exercise: physical activity designed to improve one’s fitness

Do I need to explain this one?

An alternate approach would be to mention specific activities: Her day always started with [aerobics, calisthenics, indoor cycling, jogging in the park, stairclimbing, strength training, walking on the treadmill, weightlifting].

How Did You Do?

Master List of Redundancy Quizzes for Writers