What Are Redundancies?

These nuisances are superfluous words or phrases also known as pleonasms. Rather than augment writing, they slow action scenes and increase word count — without adding constructive details.

About The Quiz

This quiz, the seventeenth in its series, offers ten sentences containing redundancies, and ten suggested solutions.

They are edited examples from books, news media, television shows, and overheard conversations.

The Answers Are in the Definitions

In most cases, you should recognize the superfluous words when you scrutinize the definitions provided with each edit.

And maybe your muse will find story ideas among the changes and suggestions.

Can You Find Every Redundant Word or Phrase?

1. He insisted on looking ahead to the future rather than back in retrospection.
2. A suspension bridge spanned across the deep canyon.
3. Completing the calculations manually by hand was a difficult feat.
4. With mental telepathy and ESP, the woman helped the FBI catch the serial killer.
5. The lanes merged together into a pothole-filled avenue.
6. The restaurant’s specialty was minestrone soup with sourdough bread.
7. She mixed the ingredients together and then consulted the recipe book for the next step.
8. A state of mutual cooperation and respect resulted in a quick solution to the problem.
9. He nibbled on the nape of her neck, sending shivers down her spine.
10. As soon as the lion was released, its natural instinct was to return to its native habitat.

Suggested Edits

Edit #1:  He insisted on looking ahead to the future rather than back in retrospection.

future: the days, months, or years ahead; the time to come

retrospection: the action of looking back on the past

Alternate wording: He insisted on [looking to the future rather than the past, optimism rather than pessimism, preparation rather than regret].

Edit #2: A suspension bridge spanned across the deep canyon.

span: to extend across

Alternate wording: A [homemade, rickety, rope] bridge spanned the [chasm, crevasse, ravine].

Edit #3: Completing the calculations manually by hand was a difficult feat.

manually: using the hands

feat: a valiant or difficult act

Alternate wording: Manual calculations proved to be [almost impossible, a challenging task, a difficult undertaking, futile].

Edit #4: With mental telepathy and ESP, the woman helped the FBI catch the serial killer.

telepathy: nonverbal mental communication

If you decided to eliminate ESP (extrasensory perception) as well, consider its definition: ESP: perception — including telepathy, clairvoyance, precognition, and other abilities independent of known sensory processes.

Although telepathy is encompassed by ESP, it is only one of ESP’s abilities.

Alternate wording: [Relying on, Using] [telepathy and clairvoyance, telepathy and intuition, psychiatric training], the woman helped the FBI catch the serial killer.

Edit #5: The lanes merged together into a pothole-filled avenue.

merge: come together and become one; combine or join together

Alternate wording: The lanes merged into [a muddy mess of potholes, an obstacle course of potholes and corpses].

Edit #6: The restaurant’s specialty was minestrone soup with sourdough bread.

minestrone: a thick vegetable and pasta soup

Alternate wording: The restaurant was [celebrated, renowned, well-known] for its signature dish of [alien goulash, brain pie, bat and beet stew, Italian wedding soup and fried fingers].

Edit #7: She mixed the ingredients together and then consulted the recipe book for the next step.

mix: stir together; put together

Alternate wording: She [mashed, smushed, squished] the ingredients in the [beaker, bowl, cauldron] and then consulted the [grimoire, scroll, visi-screen] for the next step.

Edit #8: A state of mutual cooperation and respect resulted in a quick solution to the problem.

cooperation: the process of working together for mutual benefit

Alternate wording: [An atmosphere, An attitude, A controlled regimen, A mood] of cooperation and [accommodation, sufferance, tolerance] resulted in [a bootstrapped answer, an eventual solution, a temporary solution] to the problem.

Edit #9: He nibbled on the nape of her neck, sending shivers down her spine.

nape: the back of the neck

To say He nibbled on her nape wouldn’t sound right.

Would a lover concentrate only on the back of someone’s neck? Probably not, and that’s the reason for the deletion of the nape of. However, if the back of the neck is where the [man, ghoul, vampire] nibbles, why not keep the sentence simple and say the back of her neck?

Alternate wording: He [flicked her neck with the tip of his tongue, ran his lips over her neck], sending [shivers into every nerve of her body, tremors through her body].

Edit #10: As soon as the lion was released, its natural instinct was to return to its native habitat.

instinct: a natural desire or ability that impels a person or animal to respond in a specific way

Alternate wording: As soon as the lion was released, its instinct [compelled it to return to its native habitat, guided it to its place of birth, steered it toward the lair of its mate].

How Did You Do?

Master List of Redundancy Quizzes for Writers