What Are Redundancies?

These nuisances are superfluous words or phrases also known as pleonasms. Rather than augment writing, they slow action scenes and increase word count — without adding constructive details.

About Quiz #4

This quiz, the fourth in its series, offers ten sentences containing redundancies, and ten suggested solutions.

They are edited examples from books, news media, television shows, and overheard conversations.

The Answers Are in the Definitions

It’s time to stop scratching your head in confusion and exterminate those redundancies.

In most cases, you should recognize the superfluous words when you scrutinize the definitions provided with each edit.

And maybe your muse will find story ideas among the changes and suggestions.

Can You Find Every Redundant Word or Phrase?

1. No matter how much proof he saw otherwise, he implicitly believed the Earth was flat.
2. The circle of warriors moved closer and closer in toward the castle.
3. They met every day for lunch at 12 noon.
4. Each and every vote was counted before Council decided on the type of water treatment system the town would ultimately install.
5. The telephone company offered every new customer a free gift during the month of June.
6. Because the hospital didn’t plan ahead, they didn’t have enough syringes.
7. His violation of the terms rendered the contract null and void.
8. The writer’s regular routine included more than eight cups of coffee per day.
9. The appearance of his mother-in-law at the gala was a sudden surprise.
10. New innovations speed the development of faster protocols.

Suggested Edits

Edit #1: No matter how much proof he saw otherwise, he implicitly believed the Earth was flat.

believe: to have certainty that something is true, genuine, or real

implicitly: absolutely

Although implicitly might be appropriate for a fanatical belief, in most cases it’s a superfluous adverb.

Here’s how some writers might change it: No matter how much contradictory evidence he saw, he insisted the Earth was flat.

Edit #2: The circle of warriors moved closer and closer in toward the castle.

move toward: to proceed in the direction of something or someone

closer: nearer

Would you ever say, “moved nearer in toward?” Unlikely. I googled it and found a single result.

A better version of the sentence would be: The circle of warriors crept toward the castle. Crept paints a vivid picture.

Other strong verbs that could replace crept: crawled, skulked, slunk.

Edit #3: They met every day for lunch at 12 noon.

noon: midday; 12 o’clock in the middle of the day

Noon is self-explanatory — no need to precede it with 12.

Writers of some genres might prefer midday instead of noon.

Edit #4: Each and eEvery vote was counted before Council decided on the type of water treatment system the town would ultimately install.

every: each; all; every single

ultimately: finally; in the end

One of the definitions of every is each. Therefore each and every could be interpreted as every and every.

Ultimately is another pesky adverb you can omit without changing the meaning.

A more concise version: Every vote was counted before Council chose a water treatment system.

Edit #5: The telephone company offered every new customer a free gift during the month of June.

gift: something given to someone without expectation of payment

free: without cost or payment

June: the sixth month of the year in the Gregorian calendar

The strikeouts are embodied in the definitions of the words they modify.

The telephone company could instead offer freebies, perks or rewards.

Edit #6: Because the hospital didn’t plan ahead, they didn’t have enough syringes.

plan: to arrange beforehand or ahead of time

Plan already implies advance preparation.

Specificity would strengthen the narrative: Because the hospital didn’t anticipate a worldwide pandemic, they didn’t have enough syringes.

Have could be replaced with a stronger verb such as stockpile, purchase, or accumulate.

Edit #7: His violation of the terms rendered the contract null and void.

null: invalid; void

void: invalid; null

Vicious circle? If you search online, you’ll find instances of rendered the contract null and rendered the contract void. Period.

Edit #8: The writer’s regular routine included more than eight cups of coffee per day.

routine: a regular sequence of actions

The definition of routine obviates the need to describe it as regular.

You could make the sentence more engaging: The writer gulped down more than eight cups of coffee every day.

Edit #9: The appearance of his mother-in-law at the gala was a sudden surprise.

surprise: a sudden or unexpected event, fact, or thing

Do I need to explain? Here’s another version: He was shocked by the appearance of his mother-in-law at the gala.

shock: to flabbergast, jolt, unsettle

Note how passive voice in the second version saves the surprise until the end of the sentence.

Edit # 10: New innovations speed the development of better protocols.

innovation: a new process, idea, or device

If innovations are new processes, preceding innovations with new would literally mean new new processes.

Instead of speed, you might want to try one of these verbs: accelerate, expedite, facilitate

How Did You Do?

Master List of Redundancy Quizzes for Writers