Redundancy Quiz #7 for Writers: Can You Score 100%?

Redundancy Quiz #7

What Are Redundancies?

These nuisances are superfluous words or phrases also known as pleonasms. Rather than augment writing, they slow action scenes and increase word count — without adding constructive details.

About Quiz 7

This quiz, the seventh in its series, offers ten sentences containing redundancies, and ten suggested solutions.

They are edited examples from books, news media, television shows, and overheard conversations.

Can You Find Every Redundant Word or Phrase?

  1. It was a difficult dilemma that required an innovative approach.
  2. He had a direct confrontation with his mistress, a confrontation that led to her death.
  3. She estimated the percentage of males in the audience as about 92.3%.
  4. His failings were few in number.
  5. The final outcome was completely predictable.
  6. The curio shop relied on foreign imports for its stock.
  7. She promised to love him forever and ever.
  8. Several of the invited guests showed up late for the party.
  9. Scientists made a major breakthrough in AI technology.
  10. They agreed to meet at 10 p.m. in the evening.
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Suggested Edits

Edit #1: It was a difficult dilemma that required an innovative approach.

dilemma: a difficult situation that requires a decision between multiple alternatives that are usually undesirable

Since the definition of dilemma already embraces difficult, a literal translation of difficult dilemma would be difficult difficult situation. Now the redundancy becomes clear.

Alternatives:

It was a [conundrum, mess, predicament] that required [finesse, innovation, resourcefulness].

Edit #2: He had a direct confrontation with his mistress, a confrontation that led to her death.

confrontation: a face-to-face meeting with hostile or argumentative intent

face-to-face: direct; confronting

argumentative: confrontational

The definitions should make the edit obvious. The sentence could be made even tighter:

He had a confrontation with his mistress, which led to her death.

Given the situation, shorter sentences would heighten the tension and speed the pace:

He had a confrontation with his mistress. It led to her death.

Edit #3: She estimated the percentage of males in the audience as about 92.3%.

estimate: to roughly calculate a value, quantity, or scope

about: roughly; approximately

With similar meanings for estimate and about, is about required?

Note: 92.3% seems more like an exact percentage than an estimation. Maybe the sentence should be rephrased:

She calculated the percentage of males in the audience as 92.3%.

Edit #4: His failings were few in number.

few: a small number of

This edit should be self-explanatory.

Alternatives:

His failings were [inconsequential, infrequent, minor].

Edit #5: The final outcome was completely predictable.

outcome: end result or final product

predictable: able to be predicted

The strikeout of final shouldn’t need an explanation.

Let’s look at predictable, an absolute (non-gradable) adjective. If an outcome isn’t completely predictable, wouldn’t it be unpredictable?

Alternative edits:

The outcome was [certain, expected, inevitable].

Edit #6: The curio shop relied on foreign imports for its stock.

imports: goods or services brought into a country from another country

foreign: connected to or from another country

As worded, the literal translation of this sentence would be:

The curio shop relied on goods from another country brought into its country from another country.

Ouch.

Alternative wording:

The curio shop relied on foreign [goods, merchandise, products] for its stock.

Edit #7: She promised to love him forever and ever.

forever: for always; eternally

ever: always; at all times

An adolescent or an enamored person might make such a promise in dialogue, but it would still be redundant phrasing. Here’s where narrator’s personality and writer’s voice become deciding factors.

Note the following alternative, where positioning the adverb always before the verb gives it more emphasis:

She promised to always love him.

Edit #8: Several of the invited guests showed up late for the party.

guest: a person who is invited to a place or event

The original sentence could be interpreted as:

Several of the invited people who were invited to the party were late.

Awkward, right?

Alternative wording that would be appropriate for some narrators:

Several invitees arrived late for the party.

Edit #9: Scientists made a major breakthrough in AI technology.

breakthrough: a major discovery or development, especially in science

Would you ever word a sentence like the following?

Scientists made a major major discovery in AI technology.

Probably not, unless the sentence represents the dialogue of an excited teenager, perhaps.

An alternative that sounds more appropriate for a scientific setting:

Scientists made a quantum leap in AI technology.

Edit #10: They agreed to meet at 10 p.m. in the evening.

p.m. in the evening; at night; during the time after noon

evening: night; the latter part of the day

Alternative wording:

They agreed to meet at 10 o’clock in the evening.

They agreed to meet at 10 in the evening.

How Did You Do?

Master List of Redundancy Quizzes for Writers

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Find thousands of writing tips and word lists in
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and additional resources on my Facebook page.

12 thoughts on “Redundancy Quiz #7 for Writers: Can You Score 100%?

  1. Hi Miss Kathy,

    Thanks for another cool and helpful post.

    Geez, you’d think by now, being a super slasher, I’d get all of them right. Nope. Ack! I struggled with 6 and 8. – “foreign import,” and “invited guest.” I guess that applies to uninvited people as well. Lol,

    Where I am:

    There once was a writer named Len,
    who slashed out repeats with his pen.
    Though he took lots of time
    to perfect every line,
    he messed up again and again.

    Be safe. 🙂

    Healthy hugs,

    Lenny TSS

  2. Of course you wouldn’t type “Major Major”, unless of course you’re Joseph Heller using an IBM machine with a sense of humour.

  3. Thanks, Kathy. Always good to be reminded, and I agree with your findings. Nevertheless, it is easy to make a mistake, so we have to be vigilant! Best wishes..

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